Domestic Violence is not Discipline
“Mummy if this is how marriage is, mom I don’t think I ever want to get married”
These were the words that came out from my mouth at age 7, having seen my Dad beating mom severely and watching her cry.
Many women like my mom suffer every day in silence from domestic violence all in the name of endurance.
It is one big issue that keeps rising but the most annoying part is no one is standing against it in her case.
Domestic violence comes in so many forms; from rape to molestation to acid attacks to the most common, Wife beating and corporal punishment.
Studies have shown that in Nigeria, most men see DV as “spouse discipline” which is entirely wrong. Beating up a woman all in the name of discipline is a wrong definition of discipline.
The scariest part of this deadly act Is that women are globally seen as the highest gender that experiences severe forms of violence and most cultural beliefs encourage DV.
I experienced Domestic violence indirectly (having been the first child). I felt everything that happened was my fault and thus, I literally lost my childhood. I lost my self-esteem which took me a very long time to gain back, I got affected academically because I couldn’t concentrate on school work. My social life wasn’t left out, to understand I couldn’t make friends because I felt no one understood how I felt. But I got saved by grace because I was moving away from the right path. All these that I expert understand that many people who haven’t found purpose have an experience of domestic violence.
The painful thing is Women who go through domestic violence every day, go through it in silence. Often the result of this leads to depression, emotional breakdown and worst of all Death.
Women are not only the ones who go through it, in a home where you have little children there’s a tendency that that experience it indirectly too and It affects them more than their parents even think.
Although there’s a push in Nigeria for federal laws concerning domestic violence and for a stronger national response and support for domestic violence issues, I believe strongly that if a victim of DV speaks up, this deadly and evil issue would be addressed and it will reduce the act.